Let's Laugh Together

You know when you laugh it's just like you are jogging on the inside.
Laughing lights up the left side of your brain and that makes you feel good. If I tell you a few jokes and when you read them you laugh, then I've done an okay job. It is healthy to laugh.

Joke #1
Mary Jo has a heart attack and is rushed to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near-death experience during which she sees God and asks if this is the end for her. God says, "No". He goes on to explain that has another thirty to fifty years to live. As soon as Mary Jo recovers , she figures if she has another thirty to fifty years to live she ought to fix up some things about her body that she doesn't like. She goes to a Plastic Surgeon and he shortens her nose. Then she ask him to lift up her boobs
and he does. Finally, he improves her lips so she ends up with a wonderful smile. Mary Jo leaves his office a happy camper. But while she is crossing the street she is hit by a car and killed. She soon arrives to face God and asks, "I thought you said I had another thirty to fifty years. " God replies,
"I didn't recognize you."

Joke #2
Rodney Dangerfield says, "I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a radio and a toaster." He goes on to say, "I was such an ugly baby, my mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only like me as a friend." Lastly, Dangerfield says, "I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof."

Joke #3
When I was a kindergarten teacher, I was walking around my room watching the children drawing. I stopped at little Patty's desk, Patty was working away very diligently. I asked , "Patty what are you drawing?" She replied, "I'm drawing God, Mrs. Ruben." I stopped for a moment and said, "But Patty no one knows what God looks like." Without looking up from her work, she told me, "They will in a minute Mrs. Ruben."

I hope you laughed. Give yourself a wonderful gift--a good sense of humor. I'd love to have you send me a joke. Buy a joke book and pick out one that made you laugh and send it to me. It's good to laugh together.







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Health Benefits of Dark Chocolate

Chocolate is made from plants which means it contains many of the health benefits of dark vegetables. These benefits are from flavonoids which act as anti-oxidants. Dark chocolate contains a large number of anti-oxidants (nearly eight times the number found in strawberries). Flavonoids also help relax blood pressure through the production of nitric oxide, and balance certain homones in the body.

Dark chocolate is good for your heart. A small bar of it everyday can help keep your heart and cardiovascular system running well. Two heart health benefits of dark chocolate are:
*Lower blood pressure. Studies have shown that consuming a small bar of dark chocolate everyday can reduce blood pressure inindividuals with high blood pressure.
*Lower Cholesterol. Dark chocolate has also been shown to reduce LDL cholesterol (the bad cholesterol) by up to 10 percent.

Other benefits of dark chocolate:
IT TASTES GOOD!
IT STIMULATES ENDORPHIN PRODUCTION, WHICH GIVES A FEELING OF PLEASURE!
IT CONTAINS SEROTONIN, WHICH ACTS AS AN ANTI-DEPRESSANT!
IT CONTAINS THEOBROMINE CAFFEINE AND OTHER SUBSTANCES WHICH ARE STIMULANTS!

Here is some other good news. Some of the fats in chocolate do not impacts your cholesterol. The fats in chocolate are one-third oleic acid, one-third stearic acid and one-third palmitic acid.

Oleic acid is a healthy monounsaturated fat this is also found in olive oil.
Stearic acid is a saturated fat but one which research shows has a neutral effect on cholesterol.
Palmitic acid is also a saturated fat, one which raises cholesterol and heart disease risk.
THAT MEANS ONLY ONE-THIRD OF THE FAT IN DARK CHOCOLATE IS BAD FOR YOU.

One bar of dark chocolate has around 400 calories. If you eat half a bar of chocolate a day, you must balance those 200 calories by eating less of something else.

I do not want you to gain weight. I just want you to be healthy and happy.

I eat one Dove square of dark chocolate made by Mars Candy Company every day at lunch time and have not gained any weight. I simply love chocolate and always have.

Your Brain Pays Attention to your Words

We have learned recently that your brain and mine don't deteriorate with age. As a matter of fact, it is exciting to learn that the brain grows and expands every day. Our brain is flexible. We can make it light up and
respond to our words. Giving our brain positive messages works. It is important to thank our brain for every positive response we get.

Here are some words that I say to my brain:
THANK YOU, DEAR BRAIN, FOR GIVING ME ANOTHER DAY.
THANK YOU, DEAR BRAIN, FOR HELPING ME WALK.
THANK YOU, DEAR BRAIN, FOR HELPING ME PUT ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER.
THANK YOU, DEAR BRAIN, FOR HELPING ME ENJOY ALL THE BEAUTY AROUND ME.
THANK YOU, DEAR BRAIN, FOR HELPING ME APPRECIATE THE KINDNESS THAT OTHERS SHOW ME.
THANK YOU, DEAR BRAIN, FOR GIVING ME ANOTHER DAY SO
I CAN SHOW LOVE TO THE PEOPLE WHO ARE IMPORTANT TO ME.

Please take the time to tell your brain to help you. And be sure to thank it when it responds to your requests.

Here are the names of competent professionals who have studied the
brain and know that what I'm telling you is the "emus". In Jewish that
means "the truth".

Dr. Ed Diener and his son, Robert Biswas-Diener, "Happiness" Blackwell Publishing, 2008.

Dr. Norman Dodge, "The Brain that Changes Itself" Viking, 2007

Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, "The How of Happiness" Penquin Press, 2007

In his new book, Dr. Derek Bok, the former president of Harvard University, writes: It is not unreasonable for government to provide some simple way to help the mentally ill. (The Politics of Happiness: What Government Can Learn from the New Research on Well-Being, Princeton Press 2009)

Recently, (March, 2010) Oprah Winfrey talked to Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddhist monk for more than 60 years. She heard him tell her that people need not sacrifice the present for the future. He made it clear that it is today that matters--not tomorrow. He said, "Life is available only in the present. That is why we should walk in such a way that every step can bring us to the here and now." His words were like music to my ears.

Enjoy the moment. Enjoy this blog. Enjoy yourself. You deserve pleasure. Experience it right now. You are helping your brain to light up with joy and that is so good for you.

A recent study by Columbia University showed that if we want to have a healthy heart, it helps to be happy. "If you aren't naturally a happy person, just try acting like one," said Dr. Karina Davidson of Columbia University Medical Center. "It could help your heart."

I still remember when I was a graduate student at the University of Pittsburgh, I was told by one of my psychology professors, "IAnn Ruben, if you fake it long enough, I promise you that eventually you'll make it." He was absolutely right when he told me that and I've tried it. Believe me it works.
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Rating Your State of Happiness

A psychology professor from the University of Illinois, Dr. Ed Diener,
believed when people answered the following five questions, they would be able to rate their state of happiness. See how many times
you answer "yes" or "sometimes" or "rarely or "no" to each question.

Question #1
In most ways my life is close to ideal. My answer is __________.

Question #2
The conditions of my life are excellent. My answer is _________.

Question #3
I am satisified with my life. My answer is _________.

Question #4
So far I have gotten the important things I want in life. __________.

Question #5
If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing. __________.

My interpretation:

Think for a moment, how many times you were able to answer "yes"
to each of the five questions. If you answered "yes" to all five questions, that would seem to mean that you are extremely satisfied with your life
today. If you answered "sometimes" to most of the questions, that would seem to mean that you are satisfied with your life today. Your life is rewarding but you would like to see improvement in some areas. If, on the other hand, you answered "rarely" to most of the questions, that would seem to mean that you are slightly satisfied. Some of the areas in your life need improvement and you have not yet achieved the level you would like to attain in many areas. Lastly, if you answered "no" to most of the questions, you are slightly dissatisfied with your life. If you are going through a specific bad event at this time, you should feel free to pay little attention to your "no" responses right now. However, it is important for you to ask yourself what you could do to increase your satisfaction.
Perhaps there are conditions in your life that you can change. Be proud of yourself that you had the courage to answer these five questions. Now, think about going ahead and using this blog to bring more happiness into your life. Repeat the words: I AM A FINE PERSON AND I PLAN TO BRING MORE HAPPINESS INTO MY LIFE.

BE PROUD OF YOURSELF

Give yourself a big pat on your back for your courage to meet me a 85-year-young female blogger. I am also a competent psychologist who has helped thousands of men and women learn how to overcome depression as they bring more joy into their lives. Know, for sure, that you have made a wise decision. Tell yourself right now, "I AM PROUD OF MYSELF. I PLAN TO LEARN HOW TO BE A HAPPIER PERSON RIGHT NOW." Say those words loudly. Say them and mean what you say. Don't bullshit. Say those words "I AM PROUD OF MYSELF. I PLAN TO LEARN HOW TO BE A HAPPIER PERSON RIGHT NOW." Please say those 12 words with sincerity three times. You are laying a solid foundation in your life to begin to be happier.

It is a fact that happy people live longer. Studies show that that happy people are healthier. They have no need to visit their doctor's offices. They have no need to enter hospitals for treatment. Happy people have their act together.

Happy people are a pleasure to be with. They have a good sense of humor. They appreciate every day that they open their eyes and see the light of day. They are so grateful that they can put one foot in front of the other when they walk. They smile. They laugh. They show the world that they love life.

I promise you this blog site will help you do all of that. But you have to trust me that I'm not misleading you. I live my life every day by following the guidelines I am about to teach you.

Depression Uplift

Suffering from depression is such a bummer. It robs you of joy. It makes you feel like a "nothing" person. It saps your energy. Not one person wants to go through life feeling down in the dumps. You know that many men and women of all ages and of all stages in life suffer from depression.
So what!

As a competent psychologist, I'm convinced everyone has the ability to get rid of depression. All people have to do is talk to their brain and say, "I have chosen not to be depressed anymore." Your brain will hear you. Your brain will listen to you and pay attention to your words. Say, "I have chosen not to be depressed anymore when you wake up in the morning,
when you have lunch in the afternoon and finally when you go to bed at night. If you say, "I have chosen not to be depressed anymore" three times a day, you will see that depression is no longer a part of your life. Your depression will be gone. Out the window. What a relief! Wow! And you did it. Pat yourself on the back for curing your depression.

Share your experience with others. Teach them how to use their brain to conquer depression. Teach them to choose not to be depressed any longer.
I welcome you as an expert helper.

Now that you are no longer depressed, you can choose to bring happiness into your life. I'm sure you know that happy people are healthier than unhappy people. They rarely need to see a doctor. They rarely enter a hospital for treatment. They take good care of their bodies. They exercise
regularly. They have a good sense of humor. They tell jokes and love people to tell them jokes. Happy people are a pleasure to be with. People love them and they love people. Choose to jump on my happiness wagon and join me for a ride on the right road to happiness. Welcome aboard. It's a pleasure for me to know that you have chosen to bring more happiness into your life. You are smart. You have made a fine decision.